I hate you. You ruined my life.
We will all hear these words as a parent. We will all cringe and remember our teen years.
We will apologize to our parents. So sorry Mom for the late 80′s…..
But parents love their children and hopefully we all remember to recognize that they are just these wildly hormonal beings who have no control over their emotions. Repeat this to yourself daily as a mantra if you have a teen..
I looked at my big girl a few days ago though, with her face green with the stomach flu and her eyes still my tiny little baby that I love with all my heart. No matter how much she sometimes hates me for her hair being curly or her lack of what she thinks she needs.. she is still my little girl. Even though she is taller than me… She will always be my baby. For all her awful moments of teen angst that she bombards me with, when our kids are sick, we forget all the snark and pompous-stance and just see our babies.
And today my baby auditioned for a spot at School of the Arts HIGH SCHOOL… HIGH SCHOOL…
What? When? How?
They grow up so fast.. and become their own people. It is really the most amazing thing ever to witness.
I was likely more nervous than she was today as she ran her monologues. But her words as she scooted off to do her thang… ” Mom, I am gonna OWN this”…
and I was so very very proud of my baby, who is not a baby anymore at all…
So the next time she yells at me for some unnamed offense…..I will try to remember this, and take a deep breath.. and remember how fast it has gone, and how proud I am of her as a person.
This is from an article that I stumbled….. It is good to look at our children and other adults even… from this perspective.
from a wise Ronit Baras
Expressions that set you off
Become familiar with these expressions and before you lose it, focus on the real interpretation of what you hear. You will be surprised when you do so that instead of feeling angry and frustrated, you will feel understanding and supportive and you will smile with love. Remember, when your child is upset and says something, he or she really means to say something else.
“I am bored” is really “I need your help. I do not know what to do with myself”
“I hate you” really means “I need you to tell me you love me”
“I hate school” means “School was hard for me today” or ”Something happened at school. Ask me what happened”
“I can do whatever I want” means “I feel helpless and out of control”
“You never give me what I want” means “I need something from you and it is hard for me to convince you”
“No one loves me in this family” means “I am looking for some attention”
“I am going to run away” means “I am afraid of running away”
“You don’t care about me” means “I need you to tell me you care about me”
“All the other kids get to go and I don’t” means “It is hard to be different”
“I don’t have to listen to you” means “I am upset that I need to listen to you”
“You are cruel” means “Tell me you love me”
“You never let me do anything I want” means “I am frustrated”
Words of gold to heed, oh fellow parents…. cause kid say the darndest things.. and man, does time fly by.
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